I have to confess that I am TOTALLY terrified of toilets. I am especially terrified of public restrooms because they are full of bazillions of germs and bodily fluids from thousands of other people. It grosses me out even thinking about it. I absolutely hate using public restrooms, which is a bummer for someone with such a small bladder as mine. I have to say that I never sit on a public toilet. My mom always taught us to do the squatting thing and to this day I am a squatter. I freak out if for some reason I lose my balance and a part of my skin touches the toilet seat. On that rare occasion where I am forced to not just pee (if you know what I mean) I make sure that I line the toilet seat with those wonderful paper liners and lots of toilet paper. Even though I have all that paper between me and the toilet seat on the inside I am cringing the whole time. And the thing that tops it all off is when some of the toilet water splashes up onto me! Seriously I FREAK OUT…every time…YUCK YUCK YUCK!!!!!
Now since this is a confession and I have to be honest I will also admit to not sitting on a lot of other people’s toilets. I don’t mind sitting on my own because I’m the one that cleans them, and I know that you could eat off of them, but I don’t always trust other’s cleaning habits to be as crazy as mine. No offense to all of you out there but if I see one of those germ spreading toilet wands sitting next to your toilet it’s highly unlikely that I will not be sitting on your toilet seat. Those toilet wands seriously gross me out! Most people bought theirs when they first moved out, like 10 years ago, and they have never thought to replace it. Just because you stick it in the toilet and swirl around with a little bleach does not mean that the toilet is clean. Those wands are not magic and the germs and bacteria don’t just disappear. Plus what about the thing I’m most afraid of, the seat? If you are cleaning the bowl with the wand then the seat is not getting cleaned. Oh I just think about all those other butts that have sat on it before me and it just gives me the heeby jeebies!
Okay I will stop picking on all of you that love your toilet wands. Please don’t take it personally because the fact that I’m confessing this means that I am FULLY aware that I am a clean FREAK and germs just really gross me out. I’m not afraid to admit it.
I hope you all enjoyed learning about my restroom experiences and have appreciated seeing a little more of a glimpse into my twisted mind. Until next week…
Ok, I love the post, so now my question to you is - How do you affectively clean your toilet? Do you use a wand and do you buy a new one every week?
ReplyDeleteha ha!! You crack me up! I am a toilet wand person. But don't worry, I don't use it to clean the toilet seat, just the bowl. I disinfect the seat. So feel free to sit when you come to my house. ;)
ReplyDeleteThese confessions are absolutely hilarious!!!
ReplyDeleteAlso, you guys are in our prayers for the new job, the new business, house building and selling.
Who uses the wand for the seat? Anyway, I disinfect my wand after using it, so I wouldn't be too worried. However, feel free to squat at my house - I won't have my feelings hurt. BUT, when you squat you don't give your pelvic floor muscles enough of a break to relaease all the urine, so you can get a bladder/urinary tract infection more easily. Just something to keep in mind.
ReplyDeleteI totally need to go buy a new toilet wand. Although I will defend my toilet cleaning abilities. I'm pretty anal about those pee spots that my loving husband leaves behind, so I'm constantly chasing after him with a disinfecting wipe. But whether you squat or sit at my house, you're always free to come by and use a non-public restroom if needed.
ReplyDeleteP.S. You're adorable.
Ha! I laughed so hard when I read this! My mom taught me to squat too and I absolutely never sit on a public toilet and ONLY sit on a toilet in a home if I KNOW that it is clean. (Like at your house, my mom's house & really close family friends.) At public restrooms if there is no hook for my purse I will NOT put it on the floor either-I will hold it, sometimes between my legs which makes the squatting part even more fun-heehee!
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